So you were really in love?? Or you were not??

We all share certain bonds with certain people. And friendship is such a bond where we find a mutual affection with someone irrespective of race, colour, and gender. Ever got a person with whom you eat, drink, sleep, travel and you even took breath together?? Have you ever made a bond with someone where, from a total absolute stranger to an acquaintance, to friend, to best friend, to intimate, close friend and ended up in a confusion about what next. When it comes to friendship between members of opposite sex we look upon norms we have been believing all these years. Yes, that’s what we have been grown up to. We grew up watching Monica and Chandler from Friends, Rahul and Anjali from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai (1998), Aditi and Jai from Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na (2008), Sona and Aby from Niram (1999) where friendships took a romantic turn. And we believed love is indeed friendship as in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai Shahrukh says “ Pyaar Dosti hai” “love is friendship” and made us fall for that classic dialogue.
All these taught us men and women can never be ‘just friends’. But do we really have to follow this or was this simply made up for some timeless romantic comedies and for those all-time blockbusters? Have you ever noticed the same on screen celebrities off screen? The same SRK – Kajol who shares the best chemistry on-screen gives many friendship goals off-screen with their strong bond. It’s said that they have always respected each other and helped during shoots. But coming up to any series or films, most of the lead male and female characters can be seen ending up in love from the bond of friends. And now if it didn’t happen, we hesitate to accept that because we expect that men and women are always on the road to romance. There are very few plots even to describe the other.
Yes it is natural to fall for the one who know you better than you know yourself than to fall for some absolute stranger. So if you fell for them it’s completely fine and normal same as if you don’t. It’s not necessary that all friendships to end up in love. And that is what ‘platonic friendships’ is all about. Platonic friendship is the friendship with no romantic element between the friends of opposite sex. Basically it will be without any sexual engagement, again it can be of same sex too. Platonic friends can provide love, care, support, a friendship that is healthy and deep .You just have to understand the boundaries and stick with them in thick and thin. And then you will see how beneficial it can be.
Psychology today interviewed Linda Sapadin, a psychologist from Valley Stream, New York, about platonic relationship and whether men and women can ever be ‘just friends’. She believes that men and women can be ‘just friends’ and the idea of them solely hanging out together with romantic intentions dates back to when women stayed home while men went out to work. The only reason for women to meet men back then was for romance. “Now they work together and share sports together” they can make friends. Its said that friends who are attracted to each other may recognize that qualities they tolerate in a friendship wouldn’t necessarily work in a serious romantic relationship. “If sex is part of dynamic, addressing it explicitly is the best strategy” for making sure the friendship survives, says Kathy Werking, at Eastern Kentucky University and author of We’re Just Good Friends. You can be attracted to your friend but beware that ‘attraction’ shouldn’t be the definition for your relationship. It’s the hormones that led to that attraction and you are more than your hormones, says Sapadin. But the moment one of them feel the attraction, there it stops being platonic. While these relationships do not work out successful for many, there are many for whom it came out successful.
Can a man and woman really be just friends? If a man and woman are friendly more than just friends then why can’t they just date or get romantic? Dealing with these doubters is a challenge that can’t be ignored. Today a cultural shift have come up where people keep their sexual involvement and friendships separate. It is another whole topic to discuss about ‘until when’ because obstacles in this kind of relations are many other than getting attracted to each other. Just know friendship between men and women is not impossible.
So how about giving a try to platonic friendship? And let’s give our future generation more opportunities than us to socialize and to celebrate life.